Sunday, May 9, 2010

What 3 Years Can Do...

I am amused at the fact that I have not blogged since 2007. Yes, it has been 3 years since I sat down on this spot and wrote. I wish I could feel terrible about that, but I think I do have reasons. Credible reasons, that is.

For purposes of self comfort and encouragement, my work evolved from a regular 8-hour day to an average 12-14-hour daily affair. In addition, I had school assignments and team projects to do with folks whose intelligence quotients ranged anywhere from stellar to "how-in-the-world-did-I-find-myself-discussing-school-with-this-nitwit?"

But, it was all good. I liked doing my best in those assignments, competitive as I am. I like to be on top of things. I think everyone wants to be first; they just won't admit it.

I will address that suject of ambition and drive in a totally separate post altogether.

For now, I will justify my hiatus with those activities--work and school. Well, as fate would have it, I faced the biggest battle of my life: Cancer. I think that cancer is a bully, one. Hence, it seeks to bend a person's mental frame so they give up before the fight even ensues. I am glad I flicked a finger (excuse me!) at the monster and stared into its fiery eye balls. I mean, I was supposed to live only a matter of months at the time of diagnosis.

This mutha was supposed to kill me that quickly.

Surgery, chemo, pain. That was pretty much my experience for the most part...

Anyway, I am now cancer-free. I do not, however, wish to carry a label of a "cancer surviver." I am many things to many people. I am a father and dad to 5 great children. I am a reverend to some, a science buff to others, a happy, upbeat, optimistic dude to many, and, to those who know me very well, someone capable of making capricious, unpredictable moves.

During the time I was "under the weather", I learned more about myself: I can take any dare, whatever the cost. I think that if I put my mind to anything, I can beat all competition. Therein, I surmised, lies my greatest disadvantage: I am easily drawn to try out different things because I believe I can make them work best. Trouble is I have only oe life to live... a conundrum of, and in, itself.

I mean, I am talented beyond the years I am expected to live. No, I am not talking about the truncated lifespan referred to above. I truly wish I could live to be a thousand in order to achieve some things I dream of. Again, I think that an elimination method will be my most successful tool right now. Eliminate certain projects for now, and prioritize on foundational, pilot stuff. Those should give rise to the rest of the stuff I have always dreamed of, and started to work on.

Of course, I LOVE helping others unleash their ow potential. I am glad I have helped educate my siblings, an undertaking that entailed I lay some of my own dreams on the side. I am glad that my family of 12 brothers and sisters is now self-sustaining. It is amazing what can happen over a decade!

Yes, I am all over the place, I know. But you know how it goes if you have been away for an extended period; you are overly zealous.

To end the 3-year-long hiatus, I am back to write a few thoughts now and then, as time will permit me.

Cheers!